...

     Well this blog is gonna suck for me. I have learned that stippling takes too much time in pen and ink. That's more for artists who have talent, and the time to do that sort of thing, but I'll finish it. I feel I have improved my hand drawings in many ways. I feel as if they have themselves evolved onto the paper, and they never stop surprising me. I know my stippling is going along okay. Just the time factor that is the pain.
     I have been thinking of other hand ideas. I wanna do the stippling series, but only one will be in pen and ink. My next one will be in acrylic, and the bones of the hands will be in basic shapes. Something else that I've learned that I've been getting inspired from movies, and a book I'm currently reading.
     I know I still need to improve on stippling, and maybe do hands in a different form, or make them something different then just their basic skeletal anatomy. I feel my new hand piece of fire transforming into a hand will be somewhat of a challenge, but at least it's something new. I just don't have a lot of inspiration anymore to do art, or anything for that matter.
     I don't see myself in 3 years. I don't wanna look forward to the future. I wanna hope to get through the next 2 hours cause I never know where I'm gonna be, or what I'm gonna do. The only thing that is for certain in my life right now is that I'll get to sleep at some point. The most important thing I've learned this school year is to always look for something new.
     I know one thing I got out of this class.......I have no idea what my life is gonna be like after I'm done with high school, and life will have a wide open gap hopefully with new opportunities.

Let my blog fly free...

     I have been stippling so much, and it's driving me crazy!!! Ugh...I have been looking for new ideas to do some other hands as well. I am gonna do a hand piece made out of objects found from nature, but it will not be done in stippling that's for shizzle. I might do a stippling series in a variety of mediums, and I'm not sure if I'll stick to the skeletal structure of a hand though. I have grown quite fond of the bones of the hand. It is soothing to me in a way.
     I am happy about my progress so far on my stippling piece, but I just don't feel like it's good enough for my portfolio. I can't stand doing the dots with all their tones. It just makes me so angry, but I will finish it. I am just going to take a short break from it so I can get my other pieces started. The objects found from nature project I think I will get started with. As well as another hand. I think my 3rd project for the month I will do stippling of the skeletal structure of the hand except in a different medium. Get this hand series started.
     I have been looking at hands everywhere I look at Cassie McCasky's hands whenever I'm with her, and I look at how a ring sits on her thumb, or how it moves she needs it to. I have also looked at other hands as well. Hands that hold cigarettes, and even some holding illegal paraphernalia. I feel if I painted, drew, or made a hand holding a beer bottle, or an antique bong. It's just about how the hand holds the object. Not the object the hand is holding. I even do observe my hand as it occasionally smacks Nena's leg during study hall, and lunch.
     I look at hands from all angles, and see where the index finger follows back, and hits the metacarpal. I love looking at hands. It's not till you study something closely, and then know all the things it's capable of. I knew we used our hands for lots of things, but some of the things we do with our hands is just so brutal, yet beautiful. Our hands are connected to our minds in a way. They channel our thoughts, feelings, processes, and knowledge. Aren't hands just so cool?!
  

<.<...>.>...;-;...Why?

     Shows? Really? Personally I don't want to be in any shows. That's not what I love about art. Sure I'll go to a show, and admire the art. I don't want to be admired, I don't want my art to be seen really. I do art for me, and I want to pursue it in any way I possibly can. I would love to teach it, or maybe even sell art in an auction house, but I would still do my own art. Not to be in any shows, or to be seen by people. I do it for me. Cause I enjoy it. It's what makes me happy, knowing that all I need is a medium I love, and a hand position to draw, and I'll get to work. To accomplish something I set out to do. Not something for shows.
     If I had a choice to enter my work in any shows it would be none, but I do feel very strongly about some of my pieces though. I like my first collage, my second one is ok. I like my blasphemy piece, and my first hand, and my finger still life. I have a bunch of photography pieces that I like. To me I have accomplished a lot so far. Not with hand concentrations, but with pieces that I like, and feel strongly about.
     I have so many frustrations that are rushing through my head every day that keep me from working on my art. Whether I have work that day, study for a test, work on homework, trying to remember when some bills need to be paid by, and what art related things need to be done. I am very anxious about just being at home when I could be out doing something like borrowing a camera, and taking pictures, sitting outside drawing in my sketchbook, or even reading a good book.
     When I am on my laptop at home I am always googling new artists, and seeing what they have created out there. Looking to reignite my brain to wake it up in order to have the ideas flow again. Like they used to. I have plenty written down. I just don't know which ones I am able to do at the moment.
     I don't think my work is better than anyone else's. Every person's artwork is unique in it's own way. Everybody has something they can do, and are passionate about. Some people have natural talent, and some can do art really well, but have to work at it. Doesn't mean they are any worse than someone who is naturally talented.

Another free blog...@_@

     As the popular demand for free blogs continue by Mrs. Martin I shall take it upon my self to inform you that I do not know what to blog about this week really. Most likely a continuation of what I'm working on now, and maybe something else. My dream for a hand with a missing thumb continues. It burns deep in my non existent soul. 

     My current ideas for my four pieces this month are....

         1. A hand with lacerations on the palm that run along the metacarpals in watercolor.

         2. A still life of fingers done in charcoal, and conte. 

         3. A series of hand drawn on small squares of watercolor paper done in pen, and ink (or sharpie) with 

               each having a different background color. 

         4. A hand with a missing thumb. (hopefully might change that if something better comes to mind).

   

      Having to go to work less does help I guess, but doesn't help my budget, but I manage (thanks to mom), and working on art at home on days that I don't have to work also helps my sleep schedule, but one thing I'm missing is my one inspiration. My big idea that uses what I've learned, how I feel, and my big idea, and incorporating it into a hand for my concentration. 

 

     I come up with plenty of concepts, and ideas of how I could make it happen. I just can't seem to find that one that will make me go WOAH!!! That's what I'm waiting for. I guess I will just have to keep doing more works of hands in many ways till I find that big inspiration, and what comes with it. I anticipating it to come through my bedroom door at 3 am, and smack me in the face, and just throw me out the window. 

Blah blah blah...

    A free choice blog that isn't what inspires you this week....what is this mess?! I have been working on my breadth, and concentration pieces when I can. I'm going to start a third one within the next two days. Not to mention I'm no longer doing breadth, and I'm just sticking to do nothing, but hands for the rest of the semester, it'll be a crap next few months, but I'll manage somehow. My next hand is going to be a hand with lacerations. Hoping to do it in watercolor. Not sure if I wanna do pen, and ink with it though. I think it'll be more a a challenge if I did it without. I think my most trouble with the hand I am working on now is just proportions, and thumbs. I think quite a few of my pieces will be thumbless. Not to mention in awkward poses.
      I did see something interesting yesterday though....a war veteran who decided to become a drag queen. He was missing 4 fingers total. 2 from each hand, and had a a brilliant black silk wrapping around his arm. Nails bright pink, with a star tattoo. I studied much of the hand as I could because I saw this brilliant performer, on t.v. It reminded me of a movie called soldier's girl. Now thinking about this movie, the musculature of the hand that the performer suggested something for me to draw, to understand, and find the story behind it.
     I look at hands, and study every aspect I can on the skin. The wrinkles, scars, tears, cuts, bruises, and whatever I can find in a hand. I find what can on every hand I look at. I find what I know about to hand, then look for the more challenging stuff. Like a oddly shaped nails, broken bones, or a missing chunk of skin.

Controversy? More like that shark is gonna be on my ceiling with a light above it! HELLO NEW CEILING LIGHT!!!

    That fountain is too funny. I mean it looks like a urinal. I mean come on really? That's too hilarious. To think that's been fought over is just showing how people over analyze someone's idea. That shark is so awesome. I want that with a light above it, on my ceiling, and that light better be a black light. I mean it would make me room look so PIMPIN'!!! Plus it's a shark.
      If someone will really criticize that piece of work then they can just get over, and find something better to do with their time. Ya know time. That thingy they seem to have too much of if they find this controversial. People need to find something useful, or more hilarious to do with their time. xD
     I mean it's pointless. Hey if it's so controversial, and people don't want a big deal made out of it then why make a big deal out of it? SERIOUSLY?! It's awesome, and plus when are you ever gonna see a a shark so awesome as that besides an aquarium. All know is get me that price tag. I'll be all over that!!

2nd Semester Portfolio. (Throw me under the bus now!)

     I know that my work isn't where some people would have theirs, but I'm working on it though. I know my biggest challenge will be getting my concentration up, and going. I am rather excited about it though. Since I switched my concentration I have zero concentration, and 14 breadth pieces. I'm going to give it my best try to get my concentration up, and just really focus on my concentration, and work on it whenever I possibly can to complete 12 pieces.
      Working on my past concentrations did give me some great memories with Nena Kolb(my ex-facebook official wife). Her making me look at random stuff on fail blog, and her always taking videos of me. I know that what I need to work on is just keeping up with what I need to do in portfolio, working 4-6 days a week, not getting home from work till almost 11pm, getting sleep, helping with my nephew when I can, and keeping up with my other school work. It's a challenge, but I'm sticking with what I got. I'm really gonna give it my all. Just throw myself at my art (not literally unless if necessary).
     I have learned that I definitely need structure with my art, and life. Lets just say it's very messy, and chaotic, but very routine. The chaos just pours on me in every way artistically, work wise, school, home, and many other ways. One way Ms. Martin could push me is to make sure I'm working on something for this class every day for portfolio. NEEDED TO BE MENTIONED!! (Only slightly mentioned.)